Slowpoke, slowpoke

holding steady, softening, and slowing down

photo by Kara Milstein

On slowing down, softening, steadiness, and pearls of wisdom

The question I ask myself today is, how slow can I really go?

Not a surface level, “I’m moving so slowly today,” but a deeply dropped-in, integrated, wide, expansive slowness that permeates every cell of my being.

How much time have I spent in my body lately?
How frequently have I given myself loving, exquisite attention and care?

With curiosity, I move and flow with the rhythm of sensation.

I close my eyes, take big belly breaths, and listen for the whisper of my body. I hone in on a spot in my body — my throat, my belly, my heart, my right shoulder, my left calf — and give it my full, undivided attention.

What are the sensations?
What am I noticing?
What is my body asking for?
Where can I express my love more deeply?
Where is my body asking for self-massage?
Where is she asking for a steamy shower or a cold compress?

In the subtlety, I find clarity, beauty, and steadiness. And when I let myself bask in the steadiness — without a goal and without rushing — I find that the pearls of wisdom come loud and clear. Resonant.

As someone who has blown parts of my life up, I am learning that I do not need a firey, intense explosion for things to change and my body to heal.

What I need — what I am letting myself have after depriving myself of it for so long — is softness. An intuitive, glowing, effervescent softness that touches each part of my day with ease.

My history is sinking in —

How often I have moved with rigor
How often I’ve bulldozed through my body’s cues
How often I’ve chosen a harsh path to an exuberant one

Gently, I hug that part of myself and thank her for everything she has taught me. Endless gratitude to her for keeping me alive.

Now, I no longer need that kind of protection. I am on the path of deep self-trust, a self-trust that is steady and rich with rhythm and spirit. Unwavering. Devoted. Bright.

It is from this place that I can trust slowness to be a key ingredient in creating safety and openness in my body.

There is more to say on this — always more to say — but the trees are calling me to be with them, and I must listen.

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A 3-month portal to cultivating unwavering self-trust.
A warm cup of tea or a cozy nest in the dead of winter.

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Here are some delights in my ecosystem from the past week or two 💐